How many dates should you go on before you make a decision?
It’s a fantastic feeling to fall in love. However, it can be complicated for the majority of people. One terrible date after another might make you feel uneasy, shaky, and make you worry if you’ll ever meet someone who is looking for a long-term relationship.
Though it may seem unattainable, keep in mind that finding a suitable match can (and does!) take time. Take the time to get to know your potential spouse, ponder what your future together might look like, and don’t be afraid to have the dreaded “relationship discussion.”
The truth is that there are no universal dating standards; it all comes down to chemistry and shared goals. Pause for a moment and follow these courting expert recommendations on how to make things official if you’re wondering how many dates equal exclusivity:
It’s difficult to know how many dates to go on before “exclusive talk” comes up. Different couples operate at different speeds, and what one half of a pair thinks is a terrific idea could be a complete nightmare for the other.
Despite the awkwardness of relationship-defining conversations, they are an essential component of helping a young relationship mature (or not). Their significance cannot be overstated or undervalued.
The Difference Between “Exclusive” And “Official”
You may have been out on dates with other people up until now and wondering how many dates before defining the relationship or before you make a decision…
However, you will eventually come to the conclusion that there is one individual with whom you want to make a more serious attempt, someone you believe has genuine promises as a future relationship. You might now discuss with them the possibility of becoming exclusive to one another. You can’t date other people, even if you want and you don’t engage in any sexual or physical acts with them if you’re exclusive.
For some individuals, this is the same as committing to a relationship. They consider this commitment to be sufficient evidence that the two of you are in a relationship.
A lot of couples may not be able to tell the difference between being exclusive and being in a relationship.
They may interpret this stage as a declaration of purpose that you would pursue the more serious aspects of your relationship without necessarily becoming a married couple.
It’s a kind of a scouting mission if you will. You might meet each other’s pals or spend entire weekends together if you haven’t before. You could even go on a few days of mini-adventures.
This is when you will most likely have the tough discussions that are required if a long-term future is to be achieved. Because let’s face it, you haven’t yet discussed which of you wants children, how many dates before defining the relationship, how many you want, and most importantly when.
Some people believe that these issues should be addressed and worked out before making the final commitment to a full relationship.
So how many dates does it take for a guy to like you?
With most women saying “He wants to be exclusive after three days, and many others trying to figure out how many dates is too soon to become exclusive?” Here’s how you determine if he’s looking for a partnership rather than a fling: Instead of always staying home,
- he takes you out on dates.
- Between dates, he maintains regular contact.
- He makes introductions to coworkers, friends, and family members.
- He uses the words “we” and “our.”
- He won’t pressurize you into having sex until you’re ready.
- He is genuinely concerned about your well-being. Whether it’s a leaking faucet or a problem with a coworker,
- he tries to help you out even when you don’t want to.
- He makes social media posts about you.
- You aren’t the only one who has started a conversation.
How many dates before you become a couple?
In a recent study, Ipsos, global market research and consulting business, polled almost 1,000 persons over the age of 18 to establish the number of dates singles should go on before being exclusive.
According to the poll, around 39% of respondents thought three months was a fair amount of time to wait before being exclusive.
If you go on one date every week, you’ll have gone on roughly 10 to 12 dates throughout the 3 months.
If you’ve been dating for a few weeks and are on date number 9, for example, one or both of you may be anticipating a more serious relationship and the define the relationship conversation.
Regardless of what a study indicates, you should go on as many dates as you need to see if you want to make that commitment, even if some people believe that three months is a good time limit.
If it’s date 14 and you’re still unsure, don’t ask — and you’ll probably start to see other people. You may also want to talk about it simply to make sure you’re all on the same page.
What should you think about before you make the relationship exclusive?
1. What do you hope to get out of the relationship?
People frequently enter relationship dialogues with the goal of learning what their loved other wants from the relationship without first conducting a thorough inquiry into what they want.
Before you start talking about who you are, what you represent to one another, and whether or not you can consider yourselves a pair, be sure you know what you want from your relationships, your partner, and yourself.
Consider how the two of you work closely, how you connect, and whether or not you envision your relationship withstand the test of time, difficulty, and change to figure out what you want from your connection.
2. If this individual is the right fit for you.
Ask yourself if they make you happy, support you, are intriguing to you, and are appealing while choosing whether or not you should pursue a relationship with them.
Before you pursue a connection with this individual, you must consider if you want to retain them in your life for the long haul. Consider whether or not you can envision yourself falling in love with this individual.
3. What Is Your Instinct Say?
Perhaps the person you’re dating seems like someone you could spend the rest of your life with or at least the next few months with and you enjoy being with him or her, but what does your gut tell you? Is there something about it that doesn’t sit well with you?
You may be on edge because of a previous relationship, trauma, or other causes, but intuition does not always have to have the final word. However, feeling your intuition rise is crucial because it may suggest similarities between a former abusive partner, poor relationship qualities, and harmful behavior patterns. You can bring up any worries you have when you start “the conversation.”
4. If you’re content to remain with them.
Consider how you feel when you’re around this person. Are you content when you’re with them? Do they make you a better person in every way possible?
Before committing to each other, think about those questions and what each of you would provide to a possible partnership.
5. If they genuinely care about you.
Before you lock him up, find out how he genuinely feels about you. Is he telling you the truth about his feelings for you, or is he merely trying to gain something from you?
Examine his emotional maturity to evaluate if he’s ready for a formal and exclusive partnership.
6. What is the most important thing to you?
This is a question you and your future mate should ask each other. What are the things that are most important to you? Knowing what matters to you in life and in a relationship might have a significant impact on your future relationships.
If you only want to settle down and start a family, for example, the type of relationship you want will be very different from someone who only wants to focus on their job.
Again, this is something that may take some time to figure out. Journaling, talking to loved ones, and keeping track of your relationship can all help you figure out what matters most in your life, relationships, and the future you want to build.
7. If you have similar values.
Are your values and dreams in sync or do they conflict? Is he someone who shares or complements your core values? Are you and your partner on the same page about life and how to live it? If they don’t, this could suggest severe issues in the future.
When it comes to dating, don’t rush things and don’t let your heart lead you astray. He’s out there, and if you follow these guidelines, you’ll be on your way to having the relationship of your dreams in no time.
8. How Do You Deal With Disputes?
When you enter a conversation about a relationship, you are putting yourself in the position of having to deal with uncomfortable disputes. You may wish to pursue your relationship further, but the person you’re dating may choose to maintain the status quo, proceed slowly, or continue dating other people.
Knowing how you handle conflict can help you better prepare for a potentially painful and volatile situation; for example, if you know you are prone to outbursts of rage, you may want to enter the talk with the understanding that you may need to pause at any time to breathe and cool down.
9. You’re at ease.
You found each other on Tinder. Your first date swiftly turned into your third. You can’t deny that you’re in love — and that you want to be in a long-term relationship.
However, how confident are you in your relationship with this person, even when you are happy and inebriated with them? Do you feel safe, especially when discussing your future plans together? If that’s the case, Singh says it’s a sign of exclusivity, especially if you’re at peace enough to arrange plans without worrying about whether or not you’ll be together. “An indication of a passionate relationship is when one person considers the other in their decisions and analyzes how their actions will affect the other,” she continues. “And when you’re absinthe, you’re absinthe.”