Most of the times, it is daunting to know if a guy only wants to get in your pants, or if a girl just needs a hookup and not a relationship that comes with a lot of commitments. This will leave you with the puzzle to know if it is right for you to get on the bed on a first date or allow some time to know your stand.
Is it okay to have sex on the first date?
I understand that a lot of people who are about to meet their new date on Bumble or those who had sex on the first date might be wondering what it says about them.
Today on this post, which I would like to appear more interactive, I will take a look into possible things having sex on the first date says about you as a person and would also like to hear from you in the comment section about what you think.
Sleeping with someone you just met, is often controversial as some people have it that there’s no right time to have sex whereas I have seen a lot of people who can swear by the third date rule as the best. Knowing all these, I will split this post into two and share reasons why you should have sex on the first date and what other reasons you should not have sex on the first date. This is so because everyone has a reason for his/her opinion.
Before I proceed, let’s take a look at what sex means.
What is sex?
What sex means to a man or woman might differ, but generally and in relation to the subject of discussion, sex has to do with sexual intercourse. It doesn’t really matter whether you’re straight or bi-sexual, but anything that feels sexual. Sex slightly can be anything you take it to be.
Why is having sex on the first date a bad idea?
Aside from the fear of contracting STD from guys who try to sleep with you on a first date, some people indicate that sex on the first date can make you appear so cheap and might lose the relationship. In as much as this might hold some truth, it does not tell the whole picture, but here are a few other opinions on why sex on the first date is a relationship killer.
Sex on the first date is awkward
Having sex with someone on a first date may appear to be awkward even if you guys have been dating on OkCupid or Tinder for some time now. There are things you might want to learn about the person when you engage in a physical conversation with them before you can decide what next to do.
Even when you’re connected to the person emotionally and want to have sex on the first meeting, you still could be attacked by the feeling it is awkward and says negatives about you.
Regardless of how awkward sex at first date might seem to be, you could find out how quickly the awkwardness fails especially when you begin to develop comfort and deep love for the person.
Sex on the first date breaks relationships
Why does everyone want to meet me because of sex? It’s irritating and throws me off the lane with anyone who tries this at first date. Definitely it is a red flag to me, I don’t do sex on the first date. That’s probably what I heard my neighbour’s daughter complained to me some days ago.
I am yet to agree with the belief that sex on the first date can mare a relationship, as I always have problems believing things that lack scientific backup. This might hold some truth as a lot of women believe that having sex with him on a first date can make him disappear and you won’t hear from him again.
When you’re scared you might not hear from someone after sex on the first date, then you probably will avoid and consider it a relationship killer. Because you see sex as something that will come in when you’re done building a relationship to a level that you’re comfortable with your partner to enjoy sex in the relationship.
It can be considered mature, sexy and confident to have self-control and hold on to the right time to go to bed with someone. The right time to have sex with someone is most times dependent on what you consider right. Should you sleep with a guy on a first date or hold on for a while to learn more about him? This is purely a matter of choice.
Why it is good to have sex on the first date?
It is okay to have sex on the first date, several pieces of research have proven that sex on the first date is not a guaranteed relationship killer and isn’t a shortcut to hell.
Just as different things work out for people differently, some people believe that there’s no point waiting too long to have sex in a relationship as it doesn’t really matter whether you’re seeing someone for the first or second time. What matters the most is if you guys get steamy on the first date and this can also lead to an amazing relationship.
Sex on the first date reduces pressure
Most people some times, treat sex as a hidden treasure that you would have to undergo a lot of stress and endurance to have. Some times, the delay and stresses are worth it, to learn more about the other person.
What if you keep this so long and increase the sexual tension in the relationship to a level it starts affecting you or make you even lose the whole thing?
If you consider this right for you, rethink on what you treat sex as and try it out on a first date, you might end up finding how amazing it is to have sex on the first date and how possibly it can lead to a meaningful relationship.
First date sex draws you closer
No matter how we decide to paint it, the truth remains that sexual chemistry still exists and that’s the fact, you have to get it right.
If you agree with me that sex is important in a relationship, then why are you having problems with the right time to have it? Aside from sex being able to serve as an apparatus that can draw you closer to the other person, it unveils a lot of things about him/her which will help you determine how compatible you guys are. You can see that sex on the first date isn’t a deal-breaker, rather incompatibility which you need to spot early enough.
First, decide if this is someone you want to get closer to before you hookup on a first date. If you seriously want the person to be in a relationship with you and feel having sex on the first date is right, go ahead, have it and you deserve some applauds for that.
Over to you
It doesn’t really matter if a guy touches you on the first date or not, what matters the most is how you feel about the whole thing. Sex on the first date can mean different things for different people as this might close out the relationship or start it.
What do you think of having sex on the first date, is it a relationship killer or something that can lead to an amazing relationship that’s more fulfiling?
As for me, it is not all dates that lead to sex. Expecting you will have sex with someone on a first date might leave you disappointed, forcing it is also awkward. But always let the moment, your mind, libido and heart decide whether or not to have sex with someone on a first date.
However, there’s no right or wrong time to have sex. Everything is based on your decisions as a person and what you feel is right and makes you feel comfortable.
If it turns out you’re going to have sex on the first date, make sure you protect yourself, even if it is not on a first date, it is still necessary to do so especially when the sex history is not known. This will always protect you from possibly contracting STDs.