You’re A Lover But Are You An Insider?

who's a lover? How to become more than a lover

It is normal to fall in love and more enjoyable when you’re in love with the right person.

We see people today in the society say they’re in love with someone or something or some people often called lovers.

However, it is becoming more difficult to find a happy relationship as many who do not believe in a relationship are making things more difficult for people who love wholeheartedly.

It will interest you to note that it is more daunting to become a lover and never an insider. Trying to be a lover, you can also be misunderstood, that’s why you shouldn’t just be one but more than a lover.

In light of the above many sorts to know if a lover is the same thing as boyfriend/girlfriend. While some other people consider it odd to be addressed as a lover, the other set of people take trying to say “I want to be your lover” as a sexual proposition.

Do you already know what it means to be called a lover? We don’t want to assume you know. According to Merriam Webster dictionary, a lover is someone in a romantic or sexual relationship or someone who’s in love with something, just as many are pet lovers.

That you’re in a romantic relationship with someone does not really guarantee that you know much or everything about them. That’s why most times you see people asking several questions about their partner.

Many people are on the shelf of always wanting to know if their partner truly loves them, if their partner is cheating on them or what will be the best gift their partner would love to have on special events like on their birthday, wedding anniversary, etc.

It takes you being an insider and not just a lover to know much about your partner including what makes him/her happy, his/her fears and worries and how to bring about happiness and joy around them. This is a sure way of keeping them with a smiling face always.

I know you won’t want to be called a lover only, you would want to know more about the person you love.

It’s not just about being some’s lover, let’s talk about being more than a lover…

Let’s dive in:

How Not To Be Just A Lover But An Insider

1. You can tell what their eyes say

looking into her eyes to know what's on her mind

This does not in any way require that you study signs or become one of the best psychologists to be able to know what’s happening simply by looking into the eyes of your partner.

The eyes are small, and do not alter a word but have a lot of things to say about your partner, your ability to take advantage of the power of the eyes in a relationship will give you more insight and open to knowledge that’s hidden.

Your partner might not be comfortable about the things you’re doing, and at the same time think it is not anywhere deemed close to what can be considered as a healthy relationship to keep complaining all the time. Even when they’re not saying a thing about it, they could be seen reacting to it.

Look into her eyes, look into his eyes, make your observations, know when to rethink and act.

2. Good background knowledge about your partner’s relation

Automatically you’re an insider and not just a lover when you know a lot or much about your partner’s relations, including special events like their birthday and also able to address them by their names.

So when next you want to ask about your partner’s younger sister you can easily say how’s Joan doing today, does she still play her favorite sports hockey?

The above can leave a smile on the face of your partner, knowing too well that you know and think about his/her family members.

3. You know what makes them bleed

how not to hurt your partner's feelings

We’re humans, certain things hurt and we’re in one way or the other bond to making mistakes but we’re more prone to hurting someone especially when we don’t know much about them and what they don’t like.

You’re not knowing this to make them bleed, but to avoid hurting them

If you’re able to know what hurts your partner and avoid it or know when you hurt them and apologize prior before they lay a complain, then you should go home with the title of the BEST LOVER!

You seem to read minds, yet you have no special studies on it, not like you’re able to read the minds of those who’re not close to you. But you’re reading that of your partner with almost 99.9% accuracy because you’re fully in love and don’t just want to end up being just a lover but also an insider who has an excellent knowledge about their partner.

4. Knowing what keeps them in the mood

how to keep your partner in a happy mood always

That you love going to the cinema every evening to watch your favourite shows does not mean that everyone else is cool with that.

Everyone would like to be in a happy mood all the time if possible, even though some might lack the skills of making others around them happy but they still and always hunger for the happiness to maintain a good mood.

Different people have their own way of reacting to things and for this same reason, different things are capable of making an individual happy or sad.

A good understanding of your partner leaves you with the ability to keep them in a good mood, make them happy and win the title of a lover insider.

Yes! You know a lot about them, that’s why you hit the right button at the right time and make them happy staying with you.

5. Vouching for them

sign for your partner

Funny enough you’re so deep in love with her/him but you can or cannot vouch for him/her because you’re not yet an insider. If you have gone beyond being just a lover, you can speak for them in their absence.

I know my partner, she can’t do such, I can vouch for her!

I will do this for him, for he’s who he said he’s!

You really know what it means to say the above, it takes the heart that truly loves and understands the lifestyle of his/her partner to act in such capacity.

If you’re just a lover, you wouldn’t want to sign even a legal document on behalf of your partner.

6. Catching the grenade for your partner

taking risk for your partner

Protecting your partner: You don’t have to be in the military or a ninja to do this.

Sometimes ago we dived into a social media post asking if you could take a bullet for your partner? The question was a trending one on the internet as many were giving their reasons for or against.

The word “taking a bullet for your partner” means a lot.

It does not necessarily mean when a gun is pointed on the face of your partner, would you take it?

Taking a bullet for your partner means to take the risk and willingness to do a lot of things just to keep them smiling.

A relationship isn’t always rosy, their could be ups and downs, and easy looking steps slippery, this is as equivalent as a bombshell that’s tempting to avoid when it is fired, only an insider in love with you will stick to you till the wind is over.

People who’re just lovers can vanish at this point, so don’t be one, become an insider who knows all and still loves, you know much about your partner including their flawns and you still have 1000+ reasons to show love and care to them.

7. Supporting their career

giving your partner the required supports

When in love, there’s the expectation of wellbeing and good state of mind (mental health) it is best to be in equilibrium where both share the same or equal responsibility in helping and supporting each other.

You’re a lover who’s an insider, and should not just concentrate on what you would gain in a relationship, you should also be concerned about the other person and how you can make them benefit from you.

Advise them and provide guides that are helpful to the achievement of their career.


The same dictionary explains the meaning of LOVER as often a person in love.

Especially, a man in love with a woman. In this case, to clear the air about people using lover and girlfriend vs boyfriend interchangeably. Or pointing at the meaning of lover as wanting a sexual relationship only with your partner.

It is best to learn more about your partner. You can find out if he loves you more than a friend or not.

However, we don’t want to take the meaning of lover as what many people out there take it to be. We strongly go by the meaning that present it to be someone who is in a romantic or sexual relationship.

It can be a romantic relationship only, or one involving both sex and romance. We don’t want it to just end there. There’s more to make out of it, become a relationship insider!

You can only remember moments (memories) even when someone is gone. That’s why we want you to be a lover who’s also an insider. You will learn more about your partner, what are likely to be irritating to them, what makes them happy and how to keep them smiling around you.

Have you ever seen yourself as a lover before and what gained you the trust of being more than a lover to him/her? Let’s hear from you in the comment section below.

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