How to get your ex back when you still live together – Are you still living with your ex even after you have broken up? Breaking up with your partner while you still live together is the worst scenario ever, especially if your partner is bent on not taking you back.
I wouldn’t pray for that to happen to me or anyone around me, However, situation happens, you both could be on a lease and either of you can’t afford accommodation at the moment so staying together seems to be the only option you have got.
If you still have feelings for your ex and you are looking at getting back with him or her, this could be a lot easier, because you have direct access to them.
But will they be willing to take you back? Will they love you back?
To digress a bit, let’s look at the possibilities of an ex loving you back after a breakup
Can your ex fall back in love with you?
Sure! It is possible for your ex to fall back in love with you and this is quite understandable because you both had shared a bond, you had loved, and cared for each other.
So, falling back in love shouldn’t be strange. Except in a situation where respect has been destroyed.
So long you both broke up amicably, there is every tendency that you will get back with each other.
Basically, How do you get your ex back when you still live together?
How to get your ex back when you still live together
1. Give them space
You probably just broke up, but you still live together with your ex, there is this tendency to not want to respect their personal space, especially because you were so used to them that they became part and parcel of your day.
But, now that you have broken up, the case is different, you have to adjust to that fact.
You are now exes, avoid going to their room uninvited, and do not touch their stuff without telling them.
Respect their privacy, they don’t want you all over them, especially now that you broke up
2. Adopt the no contact rule
The no-contact rule is an effective way to get your ex back when you still live together, get off their sight, and avoid texting or contacting them for months.
You can go out of the house to stay with a friend for a month, this helps you clear your mind as well as it helps your partners.
Peradventure you cant stay at a friend’s apartment, you can cease this moment to go out.
Be sure to go out earlier than them, and come back later likewise, this just so that the no contact rule can be duly observed
3. Become independent
This seems out of the box, but it’s important.
The need to detach yourself from your ex at this point is mandatory.
If she use to do the laundry, cook food, and clean the house, you should know that she can’t do that anymore.
You both now live in a separate world, so you need to find a way to get things done without depending on your ex.
Do things yourself, fix the broken door, take out the cabbage, learn how to drive, make new friends, and Just be independent.
Who knows? This unknown side of you can probably help get your ex back
Evolving means making a gradual change. Chances are, the reason why your ex broke up with you was because they don’t feel the spark between you two.
How do you reignite this affection, you can evolve, and make a drastic change.
You can change your wardrobe, get a new haircut, and live out your dream.
This change will be something he will notice right away, while he feels he Is missing out on something, you are building your confidence and self-esteem on the other hand.
Nevertheless, let the whole idea of evolving not be solely because you are trying to get back at your ex, let it be something you are interested in doing.
5. Take things slow
Chances are that you and your ex have not been communicating for weeks or months depending on the time limit you put for the “no contact rule”.
Peradventure your ex hasn’t moved on yet, this is the right time to initiate a conversation.
Living in the same house as your ex makes it easy for you to whether they have moved on or not.
However, the conversation should flow naturally, you can do it at dinner time, or while you are about to step out of the house.
The conversation shouldn’t be anything related to your relationship.
It can be centred around their area of interest, it could be about a debut movie, animals, a portrait or anything around their interest.
You don’t want to start a conversation that will revile the hurt they are trying to heal, so stick to what they will be interested in.
Don’t be surprised if they don’t respond in the way you were expecting. Chances are, that you will fail in your first attempt, but if you are serious about getting them back, you could try again, but not almost immediately, you could try again after a couple of days.
This is how to get an ex back when you still live together.
6. Find out if they want you back as well
There are several ways to go about this, especially now that you both live together.
Normally, you both are supposed to observe the “No contact rule” the first few weeks of the breakup to focus on yourself.
But, if you find out that your ex text or call you repeatedly a few days after you have placed the rule, the chances are, that they probably miss you and want you back.
You shouldn’t fall for this trick, it might be that they are lonely and looking for who to chat with, don’t let them drag you into their emotional cascade.
Another way to figure out if they want you back is if the relationship ended amicably, possibly, you guys felt you needed space to fix your indifferences.
Also, they make mention of you in almost all of their conversation, this could be a sign that your ex wants you back.
However, these ideas are not a guarantee or a surety that they want you back, they are just signs.
So, it might be to your advantage not to take the signs too serious, until they have openly said that they want you back.
7. Do not try to make them jealous
One mistake partners commit most especially after a break up and they still live together is to make their ex jealous by pretending to have moved on with someone new.
While this might seem to work at first, it doesn’t present you well to your ex.
Of course, they might feel jealous, you should also expect bitterness and hatred as an aftermath.
Chances are, that your ex is still hurting and trying to heal, much more than that, they still love you.
So, bring in a third party is inhumane at this moment, your aim is to get them back not the other way round.
Perhaps, you are looking for how to get your ex back when you still live together, coming home with a third party pretending to be your partner is not the right initiative.
8. Find out what caused the breakup
Now, there is every tendency that you do not have an idea of what caused the breakup, finding out is how you will know what to work on.
Being ignorant about what you did won’t give you an idea of what to work on.
A way to find out is to reflect on your relationship and look at what the basis of your argument was centred on.
Look at some of the things your partner complains about the most, if they are reasonable enough, then, adjusting is the best feat.
9. Address the issues that caused the break up
Now, one of the reasons why most relationships don’t work out is because of underlying issues that could have been addressed immediately, but they kept sweeping it under the rug, till it got to a point where either of the partners or both parties couldn’t bear it any yonder.
Hence, resentment piles up in the mind of both partners till finally, a day comes when they think the best option is to break up.
Another way to see this is when your partner has repeatedly cautioned you about a particular habit and you failed to adjust, this can cause a rift in your relationship and can be termed as irreconcilable differences.
So, it is not enough that you want them back, what are the changes you have made to see that history doesn’t repeat itself because if you are just about getting them back without working on what caused the breakup, there is no point getting them back.
The relationship is going to break again.
So, look out for those things, your ex complains about and adjust.
The beauty about this is that you both live together, any change from your end will be easily noticed.
Addressing what led to your breakup could be a way of getting your ex back if you are looking for how to get your ex back when you still live together.
10. Don’t repeat the same mistakes
Now, it’s ok if the mistakes pop up once in a while, but, repeatedly doing what ruined your relationship while you still leave with your ex can be burdensome.
It can build resentment and hate.
Be intentional about making a change, don’t do it solely because of your ex, do it because you are working towards becoming a better person.
11. Check if you are matured
Chances are that your ex was the reason why the relationship didn’t work out due to the bad habits they repeatedly displayed.
Now that you miss your ex, and you want your ex back, the question shouldn’t be how to get your ex back when you are with them, it should be “how to accept these habits and move past them with your ex”
Sometimes, what you deem as a problem might not necessarily be an issue, maybe, you are not just mature enough to contain these things or to look over them.
Does she leave the toilet seat open even if she kept the toilet neat after using it? Is that why you are pissed? Or does she keep her wears outside after a long day and forgets to take them in? Does he refuse to wash his plates after eating?
All these are things that can be settled amicably, only if you let love lead.
Why not close the toilet seat? Why not pick up her wears? Why not wash his plates?
The ability to contain each other excesses is what determines your level of maturity.
Allow love to lead. Is that not what a love relationship is all about? Love contains a lot of wrongs.
if you are ready to move on with your ex, how far you have matured is what you should look out for, because if you are going to be complaining repeatedly about what they didn’t do well, instead of focusing on the good things they have done, chances are you will miss out on the good side of them plus they will develop a tough skin. I Bet you don’t want that to happen.
12. Move on
Sadly, your ex might not be willing to rekindle the relationship you once had, and the hurt you will get from this can be more than the breakup itself because you guys still live together.
How do you go about this?
First off, my advice will be that you move out of the house, you should have friends that will be willing to put up with you during this time. How about your family?
This is because living with them means that you will get to see them every day and that isn’t a befitting environment for you to heal faster, most importantly, you are causing more emotional damage to yourself.
Secondly, take some time off to be alone, this will allow you to focus and work on yourself.
Also, do what you love doing, tour the world, visit the Bahamas, go hiking, or go swimming, what this will do is distract you from the challenge you are faced with.
Finally, invest your time in books, Read books that will help you intellectually, spiritually, and in all the areas of your life.
The pain of breaking up with a partner is mild compared to the pain of moving on especially if you still live with your ex.
Perhaps, your ex have said that they don’t want to move on with you, it is not the end of the world, don’t be afraid to start all over with someone new.
You can find love anytime.
If you are lucky enough, your ex still loves you and wants to spend the rest of their life with you, do not mess up this time.
We hope this article on how to get your ex back when you still live together has helped you so greatly in getting your ex back?
Remember to take things slowly.
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