Breaking up and moving on can be tough and difficult, and chances are that you don’t want your ex keeping tabs on you, However, an ex can be quite impossible sometimes. and social media has made things a bit more complicated; I would say.
Even if you don’t get to meet Physically, It becomes easier for your ex to keep troll on you even after you must have blocked them from accessing your social media handles, they can still get access to your social media pages with just a click on the search bar of any of the social media network.
I bet you wouldn’t want an ex snitching on you, especially one who made it clear that they don’t want to have anything to do with you
Why the sudden change, what could be the reason an ex is trying to reach on social media? Let’s find out.
Why your EX IS TRYING TO GET YOUR ATTENTION ON SOCIAL MEDIA
There are several reasons why an ex would want to reach out on social media, it either could be for the good or the bad.
Some can be trying to reach out to you just so that you get frustrated, they post stuff every now and then that they know would spike up anger or jealousy in you.
Another category of exes are those that want to remain friends, with the claims that ‘even if your intimate relationship with them didn’t work out, you could remain platonic friends and some just to alleviate the guilt that came as a result of the break-up, they try as much as possible to keep in touch.
Chances are that your ex is also experiencing difficulty in moving on which could be the reason why they are snitching you on your social media handles.
However, no one knows how long it took you to heal from the hurt of the breakup, and perhaps, you have not even moved on yet, An ex showing up at this point in your life could just be a signal that they are about to mess things up, and I bet you wouldn’t want that.
Whatever their reasons for showing up might be, the decision of whether to go back or not is dependent on you.
Signs Your ex Wants Your Attention on Social Media
- They respond to your social media post and photos: After your break-up, chances are that you disconnected or blocked your ex from accessing your social media handles, this is quite dependent on the severity of the break-up. Not all break-up leads to a disconnection from social media pages. However, in both cases, a distance away from your ex could be a way of healing for both parties.
Nevertheless, a sign that your ex wants your attention on social media could be the way they have been reacting to your post and photos as compared to when the break-up was fresh.
They are the first to comment or like your post which is an indication that you are still in their mind and they want to be in yours too.
After all, every notification you get from them brings a reminder of them to mind.
- A change in their online behavior is a sign – A sign your ex is trying to get your attention on social media could be a sudden change in the way they handle their social media handles. If an ex who loves to post content around positivity suddenly changes to making a lot of negative posts, especially a few months after your break up, it is a sign that they are trying to seek both the attention of their followers or fans as well as yours. Break up often leaves people lonely and void. So, it is possible that a sudden increase in the content they share on a daily basis is a sign that they feel lonely, you are greatly missed and the energy they would have channeled towards you if you were still in a relationship with them, is what they are converting into a strategy as a means of getting to you.
- They are in your DM – Maybe you and your ex placed a crossline of not sliding into each other’s DM so you could heal properly or so you could concentrate on other things instead of some feelings that have refused to leave because you guys are constantly chatting with each other. Sadly, your ex still found a way to your DM months after making the resolve not to do so, this is a sign that they want to be close to you, the choice to ignore or respond to their chat is left to you.
- Your ex makes and posts content they know you will interact with – Having spent a couple of months, and years together, your ex certainly knows what your interest is and what triggers it. When you see them making a post that is centered around your area of interest either positively or negatively, it is a sign that they want a reaction from you. For example, if you are a dog or animal lover, anytime your ex makes a post spontaneously on animals in general, It is a trap to get you into conversing with them, don’t fall for it.
- They react to your old post – Peradventure, you suddenly got a notification on your social media handle that someone is viewing and liked an old post of yours, only to discover that it was from your ex.
In another scenario, they might drop a comment on an old photo you both took while you were still together with an expectation that you would respond back, this is a sign that they have been digging your post and skimming through your profile.
- They make emotional posts surrounding heartbreak and breakups – If you are the one that took the major step of bringing the relationship to an end, chances are that you would move on faster than your ex. So it is relatable and understandable when your ex tags you in heartbreaking memes, pictures, and posts on social media. It is their way of saying they never wanted the relationship to come to an end and that they are grieving. Peradventure you had them blocked, they could tag your close friends because they are certain that even if they have been blocked, your friends will call your attention to the news of what they are sharing. This is one of the signs your ex is trying to reach out to you on social media.
- Their love life is made public – One of the reasons why an ex might want to reach out is to make you jealous, they do this by publicly posting about their newfound relationship just so you see it and you get jealous. If you are still in the process of healing and moving on, this is the best time to unfriend and block them on social media. You are hurt and it is natural to get jealous, bittered, and angry having realized that they have moved on so quickly.
- Showing off how awesome their life has been since you left
A sign that your ex is trying to get your attention is a display of how beautiful their life has been since you left>
They show major and recent achievements like getting a promotion at work, finding love, buying a house, and a lot more.
This is a bid to make you feel jealous. Fact is, while you were with them life was awesome, nothing changed when you left, Life still continued being awesome.
You are not a bad Omen nor are you an indicator of something evil. They are just being hateful plus they want you to get the feeling that they are doing better without you. - They intentionally sign up on dating apps and match with you
Breaking up doesn’t certify that you stay out of a love relationship for a long time. It is possible that after your breakup, you signed up on dating apps so that you could meet up and mingle with new people as a way of healing and moving on.
In as much as moving on is on the list of your priorities, your ex-partner is also trying to heal and move on, peradventure you find your partner on any of the dating apps you signed up for, it is not a big deal so long your path doesn’t cross.
Where it becomes an issue is if your partner finds you on the dating app and then matches with you, especially if they do that on different dating apps. It is apparent that this is an intentional act. They have been snitching and want to connect with you
- Adding You up on other social media platforms
Another sign your ex is trying to get your attention on social media is that they add you to other social media platforms. let’s say while you guys were dating, your means of communication was via two major social media platforms; Facebook and Whatsapp.
However, after you both have gone your separate ways, they find you and began to add you on all other social media platforms they were never interested in while you dated, it is possible they are trying to get your attention.
Adding you up on multiple social media platforms is their way of keeping a close watch on you, and it is also a means of communicating that they still have a place in their heart for you.
- They reminisce on a past relationship
This can happen in your DM or anywhere else, they bring up beautiful memories about something you both had or experienced together.
Some could go as far as making a post about how you guys toured the Bahamas, how you were present at a very crucial time in their life, or how you both attended an award-winning program.
Don’t be moved by all of this, the whole idea is to get your attention so you both can start from where you stopped. If you are not interested in trying things again or starting afresh with your ex, it is to your own advantage that you ignore all their advances.
- They talk about you
Their way of talking might not mean that they are directly or physically talking about you with something, it can happen that they create a post about you.
This post can either be positive or negative depending on what side of the coin you find yourself.
Their post about you on social media can either be defamatory or applauding. Interestingly, you will know that the post they make is directed towards you.
Whenever you see a post like “My ex is a clown” or “My ex is my biggest miracle” from your ex especially the first few months after your breakup, be sure to know that it is an attempt to get your attention.
- Baiting you so you feel sorry and guilty
Here is how to know that an ex is baiting you so you could either feel sorry or guilty about leaving them.
When they tag you to a sad post about how lean they have become due to a challenge they got caught up with, be sure to know that the “challenge” is you.
Seemingly, if they make a post on how suicidal they get, or how lean they have become, it is a charade on your emotions.
They are trying to get you to sympathize with them and also feel bad for leaving them.
This is what I call emotional blackmail. All this effort is not necessarily because they love you, it is a way of getting you hooked and forcing you to admit to the wrong you didn’t do.
once this is done, be sure to get kicked on the butt. They are going to show you the way out.
Now, that we have gone through the signs your ex is trying to get your attention on social media, let’s look at some of the things you can do to handle this attention.
How to handle mixed signals from an ex?
We have seen some of the major signs to look out for in an ex who wants to get your attention on social media, it is now time to focus on how to deal with these mixed signals.
Let’s get started.
- Ignore them: If your ex-partner is someone you wouldn’t want to have anything with, it is better to ignore all their signals. Pretend to not see them and move on. This might be a little bit difficult especially if you still have feelings for them and this will lead us to the next action you can take
- Block them: Truth is, moving on can be difficult sometimes, but what good is it if you seem to lose your peace or suddenly become cold over a post an ex made. Blocking them could be the best option for you
- Stick to the “no contact” rule: It is advisable to avoid communicating with an ex at least for a couple of months, this way you heal faster and move on easier. Stick to the rule, there was a reason you broke up at first.
- Speak to them: sometimes, it takes us a lot of time and effort to realize that we were the major reason why a relationship didn’t work out well, having realized this, it is of no use to keep ignoring your ex, you can reach out to them to admit and apologize for hurting them. This could go a long way in fostering future relationships.
Sometimes, ignoring an ex might not be the best approach to resolving conflict. Apart from the emotional connection that might want to be the reason why an ex wants your attention, it is possible that your ex trying to reach you on social media is to update you with any information that could turn your life around within a split of seconds.
Why not find out their reasons for wanting to reach out first, before you take the bull by the horn. Having looked at the signs your ex is trying to get your attention on social media, we hope you got a hint as to why your ex is suddenly coming around?
Feel free to share with us your experience in the comment section.
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