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Signs You Should Get Back With Your Ex

Signs You Should Get Back With Your Ex

In this article, we will be looking at signs you should get back with your ex.

You probably have broken up with your partner, but instead of moving on, their thought still lingers on, you have tried your possible best to forget about them, you passed through the no contact stage, not following them on social media, just so you could move on, but all this seems to have little to no impact.

Breaking up with someone you love is very hard, moving on is much harder, and the thought of giving them a second chance can be something that will haunt you for the rest of your life especially if the relationship burned you out.

No one wants to be stuck with an abusive partner, or a cheating partner.

So when you are on the lookout for signs you should get back to your ex, reconsidering a cheating partner or an abusive partner is way out of the box.

Sometimes, emotions can be tricky, plus our way of handling things differs, your ex might move on faster than you think, and your lingering feeling might not be a sign that you should get back with your ex, it might just be a pointer to the fact that you have not moved on, in this kind of situation, time is what you need to give yourself.

You shouldn’t be found trying to reach out to them. Focusing on how to become better is something you should prioritize during this period.

Do not allow your emotions to take a better hold of you.

If you are looking at getting your ex back, it should be for the right reasons.

So, before you run off into their DM or consider their plea, here are some of the signs to look out for.

Signs you should get back with your ex

1.      Think about why you broke up

While some relationships hit bottom rock is a result of infidelity, compatibility issues, and domestic violence. If yours doesn’t fall within this category, the chances of getting your ex back is 50%.

Because a large percentage of folks will forgive their partners but won’t move on with them if any of the aforementioned factors are the reason for their break up

Chances are that the reason why you broke up with your ex was that you were caught in the moment, both parties had an unresolved conflict and instead of you both settling amicably, it resulted in a fight, both parties were angry, and one out of the pairs thinks breaking up at that moment is ok.

If this situation resonates with you, I bet each time you think about it, you regretted that it had to end that way.

What should you do? Well, look for ways to settle with your ex, admit that you were wrong, and apologize.

Chances are, your ex is probably regretting his or her action too, your bold move will help hasten your getting back together.

2.      You have identified what triggers their anger towards you

Oftentimes, we allow our emotions to take the lead. The reasons why you want to go back to your ex should not be based on how much you love them alone.

You should weigh the circumstances, and try to identify those things you do that stir up anger in your ex. What have you done about it? Are you more flexible than you use to be? What are the changes you have made?

Make a list of those things your ex complained about, split them into sections, and guage yourself on how well you have improved months after your breakup.

If nothing has changed, going after your ex is like causing more harm to yourself.

Chances are, your ex couldn’t settle with this habit before you broke up, and he still won’t settle with it if you eventually get back together.

3.      Find out if they want to get back together

Still, on the signs you should get an ex back, the feelings should be mutual, and you shouldn’t be caught up in your fantasy of wanting him or her back that you forget to ask what is important.

Are the feelings mutual? Has your ex moved on? Are they seeing somebody else?

If you are looking at getting your ex back, you should put these things into consideration.

4.      You are excited

This is where following your guts come in. chances are, the feelings are mutual, but there is a second place for gut.

Are you excited about starting over with your ex? Do you feel good within yourself? These are questions you should ask yourself.

5.      Your ex feels sincerely sorry about what happened

One of the signs you should get back with your ex is if they have shown how sorry they are by apologizing to you and their actions afterward reflect their sincerity.

The breakup could have been a result of misconduct or misbehavior from your ex, depending on the gravity of the offense committed.

If it is that they disrespected you, or your family members at every slightest provocation they get, plus it is on a repeat, it is ok to accept their apologies, but moving on is optional.

I bet you don’t want to be treated like crap all of the time, the choice of whether or not to stick to a crappy partner depends on you.

6.      You have forgiven them

Looking for signs you should get back with your ex, forgiveness from your end is what you should look at.

You should be able to differentiate between forgiveness and trying to forget what they did to you.

If your ex is the one that needs to do the forgiveness, you should know that there is a threshold for everything.

If the case were reversed, will you forgive your ex?

Can you get over the feeling of an ex that cheated on you? Are you sure you won’t go back to opening the books?

Your willingness to forgive and let go is a clear sign that you are ready to have your ex back. However, you must understand that even if you forgive them, there are some habits no one should put up with

7.      You have both matured

If you both have realized that the reasons for your breakup was because of your insecurity or his immaturity, starting all over with your ex will make no difference if both parties have not intentionally worked on themselves.

Change takes time, and it has to be deliberate and intentional for its effect to be seen.

You can’t tell me you broke up two months ago and within these two months, you already changed, humans are good at pointing fingers, we do not feel so good if the case was reversed.

So, how long did you take to figure out the issue was with you? How long did it take for you to effect change?

Two months is such a short time to identify, acknowledge, and effect change.

Let’s say the problem was with both parties, even if you have identified it and you are making the necessary adjustment towards change, has your partner realized the part he played too? Has he acknowledged that he needs to be intentional about working on himself for you both to have a workable relationship?

Importantly, how you measure change is to determine how long it has been since the breakup. A week, 3 months, or a year?

Like I said earlier, 2 weeks or 3 months isn’t enough time for you to realize that you played a primary role in sabotaging your relationship, let alone effecting change.

To digress a bit, I will like to explain what maturity means, Maturity could mean different things depending on the situation.

Maturity in this sense could mean that you have gained the tenacity to accept the weaknesses of your partner, what ideally could get to you while you dated is no longer an issue, because you have matured both in mind and in conduct plus you allow love lead.

So accepting their flaws is maturity.

Furthermore, another way to look at maturity is your ability to talk about sensitive matters with your partner without an outburst from their end. There is a way you can communicate an individual’s fault to them without directly sticking your fingers into their faces.

Are you up to the task? This is how to measure if both parties have matured and changed.

 Fortunately enough if that is the case for you, these are signs you should get back with your ex.

8.      You are both operating on the same wavelength

One of the signs you should get your ex back is if you both are on the same page. If partners in a relationship want the same things for their relationship, the success of that relationship is guaranteed.

But if you are the committed one, and your partner is a carefree type, plus he isn’t ready to stay committed to the relationship, essentially, moving on is the best option you have.

Because he is never going to walk through with you on any adjustment you both should make.

Basically, I think asking what your ex’s intention Is about getting back is paramount for your mental health.

This will save you from future dramas.

9.      You both remained friends after the breakup

If you run into your ex at the mall or a party, are you going to have cold feet due to how bad you left them or you would exchange pleasantries?

If the former is the case, then the chances of getting back with your ex are slim.

Now, it is important to know that during post-breakup it is ok to not contact each other for months until both of you are sure to have moved on.

But if you guys coincidentally meet after the breakup and you can’t be civil or exchange pleasantries with one another without having to start a fight, then you have got no chance of moving on with your ex.

That your relationship didn’t work out does not mean that you both should keep an uptight face when you coincidentally meet.

It is ok to relate with your ex as you would with people.

10.  Your family approves of your relationship

Chances are that when you guys broke up, your family didn’t take the news so well because they liked your partner and they felt your relationship was going to work out.

You guys were so into each other, your friends liked him or her, and so do your parents.

Interestingly, after the breakup, his parents want you to come over so that the issue can be settled amicably and so that you guys can get back to dating each other, this is one of the signs that you should get back with your ex.

Ironically, a lot of people make silent prayers that they should be loved by their spouse’s family members because this poses as a big problem if the case were reversed.

Their acceptance of you as a part of their family member is a clear indication that you should get them back.

Signs you shouldn’t go back to your ex

`1. It was an abusive relationship

   “It will be different this time” is a language that is common with abusers. There are some things you just shouldn’t settle for, abuse is one of them.

Now, there are several forms of abuse, it could be verbal or physical. Both have an impact they have on their victims.

Abusers are very unlikely to change, so it is in your best interest to not get back with your ex.

There are millions of people out there, choose to be with someone that treats you special. You are not a piece of baggage that should be tossed to and fro plus you are not the one designed to help anyone fix their abusive nature. That is why we have therapy.

They should visit a therapist and have their therapy session without you.

2. You are scared of what people will say

“The people factor” is a reason why we have a lot of failed relationships today. You have placed people’s opinions about you above what you feel.

people’s voice resounds more to your hearing than your voice.

Truthfully speaking, You shouldn’t go back to an ex simply because your family loved them, you should have weighed the options before considering having them back in your life.

If the negatives surpass the positives, I will suggest that you don’t consider moving on with them.

3. you are scared of starting over with someone else

Another sign that you shouldn’t get back with your ex is if you are scared that you won’t find someone new.

This is incorrect because you are going to find someone that will treat you like the king or queen that you are.

Do not settle for a toxic relationship because you feel the time is not on your side as a lady.

The pains you will endure in that relationship is worth the wait.

Don’t settle.

Finally, beyond getting to discover the issues that led to your breakup and seeking to effect change, it is important that in a bid to get your ex back, he or she is also interested in working things out.

If they don’t have a solid reason for wanting to start a relationship with you, then it is of no use to move on with them.

Be sure to know their intentions and commitment before starting by looking at some of the signs you should get back with your ex that I have already mentioned in this article.

You deserve to be loved. Goodluck

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